Spunk Driving

Whenever I dated boys I was a total watcher. I'd watch them through their windows at night (not true just seeing if you were paying attention). I always wanted to see how they would react in certain situations. I guess it was my way of deeming them knightly or...un knightly? If there's anything that can bring out the worst in someone and make someone go from enchanting to utter troll face it is the black road of despair (also known as driving to civilized creatures). It's the worst because everyone thinks that everyone on the road is an idiot...except for themselves. This includes myself I must say. I'm a pretty nice person but when I get on the road I'm a bit aggressive, okay I'm a crazy face.

1. Whenever someone cuts me off or turns in front of me quickly I speed up to make it look like they're cut off/turn was worse than it was.

2. If someone ends up turning but doesn't have a blinker on and I was waiting for them I say a smug, "Thanks for the signal poopy head." (You may not use the word poopy head this is my personal favorite but you might substitute it for words like jerk or troll face or bug eater.

3. If someone isn't paying attention when the light turns green my face turns red.

4. If one of them hoodlums is weaving around cars like their in Nascar I speed up so they can't get around me.

5. If I'm ever behind or sandwiched by semi's I grunt in despair and speed up to get as far away as possible from them.

6. If I'm behind a car while it's driving in neighborhoods eerily slowly searching for a specific place, I go around them.

However

I cut people off, sometimes I don't see green lights in time, sometimes I get lost, sometimes I turn really slow, sometimes I take turns too hard or dips to slow. Sometimes I hit people...okay I don't do that I hit people,cars,animals, bikers and more people mostly (joking about accidents is never funny).

Am I crazy? Are we all just terrible drivers or am I making the world a worse place?